Mongol Cosmology

Source of the Primordial Hairball
The Original Camel: Source of the Primordial Hairball

When physics sucks some comedy will keep the ghosts of Faddeev and Popov at bay.

Since every man and his dyspeptic dog has a kooky cosmology we shall have one too!

Here follows The Great Secret of Mongol Legend.

Mongol Cosmology – The Book of Genesis
The Universe started when a lone Bactrian camel, wandering the formless wastes of the Interstitial Gobiverse, coughed up a Cosmic Hairball.

This is is the Primordial Hairball of the Bactrian Camel.

Prone as they are to gastric incidents the Original Camel then farted.

This ignited the Primordial Hairball and gave birth to all that we see around us.

On the Seventh Day, there were Marmots.

This was good because they carried Plague which rid the world of Bureaucracy.

The Marmot: Carrier of Plague and Tasty as Well
The Marmot: Carrier of Plague and Tasty as Well

The Great Kahn ate one and saw that it was good.

So Endeth the Beginning.

The Minianthropic Principle

Despicable-Me-2-Evil-Minion-AnimationThe Universe is Exquisitely Finely Tuned for Comedy

We introduce the Minianthropic Principle in response to this post from Robert Tucci:

The Seth Lloyd Quantum Computing Show

There he highlights some of the more foolish moments in the Grand Game of Quantum Confusion. When you read the Bullshit published by big names in Quantum Computing today you realize it is high time we replaced the Theories of Everything, Anything and Nothing with a Predictive Theory of Divine Comedy.

To Whit: We present The Minianthropic Principle, which asserts that:

The Universe is Exquisitely Finely Tuned for Comedy

Prepare for the truth people…

The Universe is really a holographic projection screened for the entertainment of Minions at the Gru Googleplex. Anything bad that happens in this world is really a Cosmic Joke carefully crafted for Minion pleasure.

In the comfort of the Gru Googleplex, Minions dine on Calaubi-Yau Cupcakes and throw cosmic raisins at the Silver M-brane. Anywhere a cosmic raisin strikes the silver M-brane there pops into being a new Universe.

It is the Truth… You Know it Makes Sense.

There is a Book coming… In the Pipe 555.